Monday, October 02, 2006


I'm tired
I'm tired of not writing
I'm tired of failing.
I'm tired of being worse than everyone else.
I'm tired of not being as competative as everyone else.
I'm tired of not being able to spell "comptetative" without looking it up in a dictionary.
I'm tired of trying to explain to my husband why it's wrong to say things like "Just what I expected" when he finally sees the face of the annoying driver, or why it's wrong to say to our daughter that "Don't shoot: first of all, you're not a boy, second of all it's wrong."
I'm tired of letting my advisor down.
I'm tired of being lonely.
I'm tired of not exercising.
I'm tired of not getting things done.
I'm tired of procrastination.
I'm tired of beating myself up instead of doing something about it.
I'm tired of the expectation that I will barely have time to take one day off a week.
I'm tired of the expectation of balancing family & work.
I'm tired.


Blogger post-doc said...

Me too.

And I'm sorry.

[Insert encouraging but not condescending comment here - I can't think of one, but the desire to write one is there.]

12:13 PM EDT  
Blogger ScienceWoman said...

I'm sorry. We all struggle with trying to balance our expectations and obligations (those imposed by ourselves and those externally imposed). I hope something comes along today to give you a boost of energy and some hope for the future.

12:35 PM EDT  
Blogger ceresina said...

Thanks, both of you. I know that there's nothing but whines here, but it's so exhausting to have all those little drips on you for so long.
Thank you for stopping by; I appreciate it.

12:59 PM EDT  
Blogger Lucy said...

*hugs* I'm sorry.

5:04 PM EDT  
Blogger Kate said...

Keep dripping -- it helps make you less tired. :)

Sorry you're feeling crummy, c.

9:15 PM EDT  

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